Day 188: Brewery tour

Well, Friday could not have been much more bizarre. Up at 3, walk at 5 (very slow), off to work, called to lunch at last minute, to watch my lunch mate down his beer that came with the meal, and then mine. Then off to, of all things, an intimate gathering of people interested in beer at a local microbrewery hanging off a pub, to meet the guy who has been a brewer for 50 years, try his efforts and then do a tour of the brewery (which is right through the bottleshop).

I asked a lot of questions but didn't drink any of the amber fluid. For that, I brought with me a beer loving young lady I work with, so she drank the beer and smiled and partook in that side of it while I just had my waters and chatted to the beer journos who were there.

All the while fucking exhausted from lack of sleep, which made me act at least as relaxed as those who were drinking. I think I've mentioned that before, but I find it fascinating how I seem to go into 'drinking mode' in a social sense when I am around people who are drinking. I can banter, laugh and carry on with the rest of them, and then when I leave them I'm still in a relaxed, non-work mode as though I have been drinking.

Talk about conditioning! It's a good thing, I think, as it means I don't miss out.

It only works to a point of course. People there yesterday were not binge drinking. You can't fake it to that level, and probably just as well.

I am well and truly off the drink though. At least for now. For the most part I didn't feel any pangs of exclusion or desire or regret yesterday. I didn't even think about breaking or whatnot. The only time I sort of thought about it was when one of the beer guys asked me how I was going and what was it like etc. This again shows how habits can be broken; and how your mind can change if you give it a chance.

I wonder what other habits I could change in the same way for the greater good? Food is an obvious habit, and exercise. I guess cleaning up around the house.....

Sounds a bit dull doesn't it. But I think there is something in a realisation that you can change habits that are deeply ingrained. That would suggest that almost any behaviour can be modified, be it smoking, drinking, going to the gym, working harder or less - anything.

On an intellectual level though yesterday was an example of the good beer can do. It brought us all together. It provided pleasure. It made people feel good, laugh and enjoy themselves. It let me enjoy myself, and I wasn't even drinking.

Not one of the participants was drunk, in a binge sense (at least as I define binge).

I think perhaps had I been drinking though I would have drunk more than any of them. I would have had a pint or so to finish, rather than a few pots. I would have been nicely pissed, a bit raucous, and I would have continued drinking afterwards if I could find someone to drink with me (in this case I would have gone to work drinks back at the office and had a few more).

I would be feeling like shit now, and perhaps eaten shit last night and be thinking about a bakery run this morning.

No way I would have exercised today.

Ah alcohol. How complicated you are.