Day 173: Weight

I've been thinking about the weight side of it. I'm keen to lose some more. Indeed, that is really driving this whole year of the grog for me. I want to look like one of those fit, healthy, lean guys like the demi-god I see running around Mt Cootha in the mornings. Not the guy who looks as though he has spent too much time at a desk (like 10 years) while drinking too much and eating too much.

If I knock off this last kilo or so then it will be 15kg in 6 months. To be honest, I would love to do that again, and even again after that. Big ask. A bit big for the brain to handle normally. That's why I have tried to focus on the long term routine of it.

It is a mental challenge, health. I think it is mental stress or anguish that can cause people to seek refuge in a glass - who doesn't like easing the troubles of the world with a glass of wine at the end of the day. I think that is one of alcohol's great strengths, that sense of relief, and escape from the drudgery of routine, especially historically, when a day down the pits really was shit.

We have less to complain about now, at least in Australia. Life is pretty excellent for pretty well everyone, if you have the ability to see it in perspective.

Anyway, it can seem very slow, this weight loss, when you are no longer on a roll. When you jump on the scales and the number stares back at you. Routine, I dare say, is the key. Routine that results in progress in one direction rather than the other, and an ability to keep that routine up for long enough that you hit the mark you want to hit. It is that 'simple' from a logic sense.

But it is a marathon, and not a sprint. In fact, I think it is really a marathon that goes forever. This demi-god I see running up and down the hills of Mt Cootha is certainly not there to lose weight. I guess he wants to look and feel like a demi-god, and his routine involves sprinting up and down hills that would make a billy goat puke (to quote First Blood).

It helps to keep a little diary like this. It encourages you to think about it every day, and you can see your progress over time. And unless you are starving yourself (or even depriving yourself, which doesn't seem to work so well) then the weight will only start shifting when you are in a solid exercise routine and have kept it up for some weeks. The routine is the most important thing. In a sense it is the most sustainable thing too - who wants to feel deprived over time? I can't keep it up. But if you fill your life with other things - such as the daily exercise, or vegetables - then there is no deprivation as such but an addition that when sustained will result in you moving in the right direction, which is what you need, however slowly.

How does that fit with the alcohol deprivation? I guess, for me, it's different. I don't even feel deprived any more to be honest. Not really. That's why I don't write about it. I don't even think about drinking any more. We had a function last night. Piss. It didn't cross my mind to have something. In fact, I had a lunch yesterday: more piss. Again, I wasn't missing out. Didn't even think of having something. I would have been the guy slipping down 3 beers in 30 minutes and getting raucous. Now my only angst is over whether or not I should have the lemonade. Why can't they put out some sparkling water for people who don't want to drink piss or fizzy drinks?

Taking alcohol off the table - which you don't miss eventually - makes it easier to establish the routines that otherwise result in you looking and feeling better about yourself. It is before 5 in the morning as I write this. I will have to wrap it up soon - in fact, really soon - as my 'terminator' mother will be here in about 10 minutes and we will be off to walk the mountain again for 1.5 hours or so.

Do you think I would be in the mood to do this if I'd even had 2 beers last night?

Nup. And even if I forced myself - walking with a slight hangover, there will be a time when I have 6 beers instead of 2, or 10 beers, and there is no way in hell I would be walking after that. And so the routine - the precious, solution giving routine - would be broken, as well as all the crap you can eat when hung over and the like.

Anyway, in terms of re-establishing my routine, I've walked Sun, Mon, Tue, Wed, Thur and shortly Fri - and 5 of those 6 days will have been around the mountain.

If I keep this up the scales will be my friend again.